I’ve been thinking a lot about next year, lately. It’s unanswered in the extreme, which I’ve been unwilling to face. After all, I’m a planner and extremely intuitive, so it’s difficult to not be able to see into my future. It’s also difficult to realise that I have little control over what is to happen.
This weekend, I’ll be interviewed in order to become a Student Advisor, and it has me in every sort of nerve. Many people apply for the job. Many, many, many. But only about ten percent of the applicants are chosen for the job. So, I’m hoping that I can give the best appearance possible in order for the committee to choose me as a future student advisor.
Should I not be chosen, there are many different routes that will be open and closed in my life. There are many back up plans, one of which I really like and is my second choice, but I’m still very confused as to how I will do without being chosen as an SA.
With SA, it will be my campus job. It’s just about twenty-four-seven, but I will manage. Lots of leadership, planning, caring, etc. I can do that. I’ll also be given my own room, which will greatly improve my sleeping habits, and my room and board will be nearly covered. That, alongside my existing scholarships, means that I wouldn’t have to worry any more about how to pay for next year.
But those aren’t the reasons I really want to become an SA. I want to become one so that I can help build a community, be someone there for others when they need help, and so that I can be someone for others to look up to. After all, I want to be a counsellor later on down the road, so this seems like a logical step towards that. Plus, I enjoy helping other people.
It will be a lot of work, but I can do that. I’m sure.
Should I not be chosen, I have several back up plans. The first is to move in with my friend Katie and be room mates down the hall. She has a double deluxe room, and we get along quite well, so that would work quite well. Should she find a room mate before then, I’ll squat my room and hope for the best with a room mate next year. That, or I’ll still squat in my room but buy out the whole thing. That will cost a bit more, but I would be willing in order to bring some balance to my life and so that I wouldn’t have to worry about roomming with someone I disliked. But, even with all of those options, I have no way to pay for it without more scholarships or a good job. And I’ll be low on time for a job that’s not SA (AKA: driving to a job and such would be difficult for me). The only thing I can think of would to be a tour guide for campus, but I’d need to see how much that would pay and if it would be enough.
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Meanwhile, I’ve been thinking a lot about decorations should I end up getting my own room next year. My theme would most likely be New Age since that has become the theme of my life, anyway. There are some really neat lamp ideas that I have including hanging a light wash of fabric over the main light in order to have a glowing room. Then, I’d supplement light with hanging lanterns which I’m going to figure out how to make with wire and fabric over the summer, and I also have three matching lamps in my room right now that I will be able to add. I also plan on painting a few more paintings for my room, regardless of where I am next year. I want to finish my seasons scene, and I thought of a neat idea for some abstract works this morning. Also, I saw some neat wall hangings yesterday that I would like to buy regardless of my roomming in order to use as decoration on the wall or as a separation for a changing area. But I’m still thinking about that. Last, I’ve been thinking about bringing up my trunk next year to use as storage and seating. But that depends a lot on room and the like.
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You may be wondering why I’m not roomming in the same fashion as this year, but my room mate and her best-friend are roomming together next year in the room beside me. I found it humorous how nervous they were about telling me; maybe they thought I would be very hurt. But I had called this months before, and it came as no surprise. Chances were, I knew that they were going to room together next year before they even knew it. They’ll get along very well, and I’m of course, not upset about any of it. After all, life moves, and these aren’t things that bother me. It opens and closes doors. I don’t mind.
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Noah and I visited our friends at Mizzou yesterday, which went surprisingly well. We didn’t do all that much, aside from go out to eat twice, sleep very little, watch some films, and later walk around town to poke into shops. I ended up buying three new albums while at Slackers (Enya and two Loreena McKennitt). They’re wonderful, and I’ve been listening to them since.
There’s not much else to say about that. Just know that I’m doing well for now, though I’ll be starting some psychology reading rather soon (I have much of it). And then I may hang out with Rebecca or watch some football with Abby. Either one. Doesn’t matter. Hopefully you find yourself well.